The Thought Of The Day.

You are absolutely amazing, and beyond beautiful, yes you looking at this screen with her hair up in a towel no makeup on with a cup tea, yes you the one who's in her sweat pants oversized t-shirt who has been cleaning all day long and your hair is in a messy bun and you just needed a break before you mopped the kitchen floors, yes you the one who is in her gorgeous light blue dress her hair curled and her makeup is on point and your sitting in your car waiting for your friend to show up to eat dinner. You, you amazing women you, you're absolutely beautiful, you're stunning, you're brilliant and so bright you just have to see yourself in a new light. Forget about all your "imperfections" forget about your stomach not being flat, forget about those honey thick thighs touching when you walk, forget about how you don't like your arms or your legs. So what if you have stretch marks, dimples in your thighs, acne, grey hairs, a double chin, straight hair, curly hair, ect. None of that matters honey, you should never look in your mirror and think, "Oh I need to change, I need to loose weight." You should feel beautiful so what if your not a size 0 not everyone is, God didn't create us to all be the same it would be a very boring world if we all looked the same, He made us unique and just how He wanted us one of my favorite scriptures is from Pslam 139:14 "I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." We are fearfully and wonderfully made, God had no fear when he made me with a little extra curves, wild red curls that bounce around my freckled face, He made me to be wonderful, and that includes my body, He created me just as he wanted me to be and he doesn't look at me and say, "Oh my daughter down there, yeah um, she needs to loose about 20 pounds." No, he looks at me and says, "Look at my daughter down there, she is absolutely gorgeous fearfully and wonderfully made just as I have created her to be." Him, the God of the universe made you just how you are, and goodness does he love you just as you are. So why shouldn't we? Why shouldn't we love ourselves just as God intended us to, we should look in the mirror and say, "I look good today!' If we constantly are negative about our bodies and who we are then we will never be happy, you have to sprinkle that self positive love on yourself, and yes it is not easy, and yes it is a daily effort, but you know it's so worth it in the end because how can you love others without loving yourself first. So I challenge you, yes you, to everyday that you look in your mirror that you not pick out those "flaws" but instead you praise them and you embrace them because honey you are a masterpiece full of beauty that deserves that cookie  and never forget it.

The Thought of the Day.

As I sat down finally able to write a blog from the busy past few days and weeks, I struggled whether or not to post this, this blog post isn't going to be like my last, it's a bit more personal I want to share a thought with you one that I find myself replaying through out my day and it may not be a easy one to swallow nor one we want to admit. Last week I had some friends over and we were painting on canvases being artsy playing music having a good time crafting together, I had just finished painting on my canvas and I looked down at my work and absolutely disliked the outcome the colors were to dark and didn't match the rest of the painting at all and I found myself adding water to the already painted colors to brighten them. I looked back down hoping I would be more pleased with the outcome but was even more dissatisfied, so I completely painted over it making the "mess" go away finally painting what I saw as a complete and "perfect" painting. I found myself doing this again this week on my driving, as well on the book I have been writing, telling myself I need to drive better as well as I could be writing better and comparing my work to other authors and as I set talking about how I hadn't been doing very well about writing in my book it hit me as I had went to go and hang up some laundry I was guilty of something I find myself doing all to much and I know I'm not the only one I had not only put myself down telling myself I wasn't doing a good enough job but, I had also begin to compare myself to someone else. This is something that I know I'm not the only one that does this, I hear my friends, family members and even strangers doing the same thing saying thank you to a complement but then saying that maybe it would be true if they were as skinny as her, or whether its something they've worked on like a painting and you keep telling them how good it looks but they find something to point out a small flaw making them doubt their work and making them say, "I could've done better." or "I don't like it, it doesn't look good like yours." I even hear this within our church people comparing themselves to someone else and putting themselves down for something they did great on. How many times can we honestly say we do this is? Is it once a day, is it a day out of the week, or do we do it so much we don't even realize. If we constantly put ourselves down and  telling ourselves were not good enough and we should've done something different, were letting negativity abide in us we can't grow and flourish if were not patting ourselves on the back every now and then saying were doing a good job, if we don't look at ourselves in the mirror and tell our reflection "Dang girl you look good today!" were never going to grow and have positivity and only think negative about ourselves and eventually that will spill out of you and touch everything around you making your world grey and draining the vibrant colors from around you. As I was thinking about this a thought came to my mind and I like to think that it was God's way of showing me his input on my on going debate in my mind. When God created creation, He didn't look at it after He was finished and think to himself, "I should've made Pluto purple, and maybe a little bigger." No He didn't do that He knew exactly as he was forming Pluto that he wanted it to be a small planet, that He wanted it the exact color He had spoke, He wanted it to have the dents, edges, and the size He created and on the seventh day he didn't say "Oh I could've done better." No he saw it and he said it is very good. That jumped all over me, because as I sat and thought that thought in my head playing it over, and over, I begin to think, how many times have I tried to change me, the me that God created, how many times have I tried to change my shape, my edges, my dents, my scars how many times? How many times have I put myself down about my writing or my driving saying I could do better or maybe if I did it like Jane Austen I would be more pleased. How many times have I put myself down saying it wasn't good enough? My answer, a lot I have said, thought, and done these things more than I would like to admit. My only question I had as this ran through my head is this, if God created me, little ole me, and he made me in the image of Him the image of my heavenly Dad, the same God who created the planets who created Pluto one of my favorite planets, and He created me the same God and he looked at me with all love in his eyes and he looked at me Christian Almond and said, "Oh look at my daughter that I have created, she is good." Then why can't I look at myself, my driving, my writings, my everyday and say "It is good." If God can look at me this bundle of redheaded mess and say "She is good." then why can't I? All the things I compare, and put myself down for and consider a mess it doesn't matter none of it, you want to know why? Because why on earth would I want to compare myself and down myself if the creator Himself says I am good. Jesus says to you right now everyday that you wake up even the days you're comparing, you're putting yourself down and letting all that negativity flow through you, He is still telling you,you are good.

A Day In A Life Of Me

Time flies by once you get out of high school, it seems that you have all of these impossible decisions to make and you are completely clueless of what the answers to the decisions are and will be. As the time continues to fly by you find yourself in this awkward middle ground where your not a kid anymore but your also not an adult yet ether and you feel like your running around in the middle of maze trying to figure out where to turn next. For myself I am still stuck in the maze, though being graduated for a year now and being nineteen I am still trying to find my common ground and myself, even though I'm confident in who I am and who I am becoming, facing the milestones that come in life. Today I faced one of those milestones, today I went and got my permit. Now I know what your thinking, "This girl is nineteen and doesn't have her license, what is she doing?" I have never been the person who rushed things especially big events in life, and honestly I never really wanted to drive the thought of being behind the wheel always sends a surge of anxiety through me the what if keeping me from going and taking the test. I study for months and finally decided this week I would go and take the test to get my permit being a inexperienced driver I thought it best to start with a permit instead of hopping right in and driving off like a mad women, I though a permit was safer and better for me personally. We went Thursday morning and got to the dmv and it was packed out people were sitting outside lined up, so we decided to drive to another dmv about 30 minutes away, once we get there we walk in my nerves are skyrocketed, I take a seat readying myself for the test to only find out that I have to make an appointment their not allowing walk ins. I was honestly a little relieved thinking that I would have a little more time to get myself together and run back through my signs for the 100th time. We drove all the way back to the little town I live in called Albemarle, the crowed still lingering out the door we decide to stay and wait, I finally make it to the desk I lay out my papers to find out that I don't have everything I need. So I went back home empty handed, though most people would have been aggravated and upset I was the opposite I felt it as though it was not my time and not the day I needed to get my permit that I would keep my head up and try again another day. I just didn't think that day would be today, as my dad came home from work he set on the couch and nonchalantly asked me if I wanted to go and try again, I decided it was now or never second times the charm right? We walk in, I'm a nervous wreck I'm shaky my heart is pounding I'm pretty sure you can hear it across the room, I step up laying all my paper work down having it all in hand only to be told that I don't have the correct copy of my birth certificate. Once more we leave and we go down to the court house praying we can get in and out quickly so I can get my permit today, at this point I'm wondering if God is trying to say I'm to unsafe to drive and shouldn't get my permit. Surprisingly we get in and out in a jiffy and hurry back to the dmv to finally being handed the numbered ticket that would lead me to my destiny of the permit. I feel like time is moving at a slow pace, number, after number, is called out and then finally my number is called out flashing on the tv screen. I walk back to only forget my confirmation of address *mentally slaps myself.* I finally sit down and after feeling and signing everything out and taking my signs test, it is finally time to take the permit test. I go and sit across another poor soul who was probably completely composed and not shaking in their seat like me. I go through the questions and my heart stops as the screen goes black and I'm thinking "Oh no, I broke the computer." I mean if someone is going to do it,its going to be me. I read over the screen as it says I have passed and only got two answers wrong! I had to read it twice because I actually did not believe it, I needed to make sure it wasn't my eyes playing tricks and changing you passed to you did not pass. It set in after re reading it over again and I could've done a little dance of happiness in my seat but I contained myself. I felt proud and relieved all at once, I was relived it was over and done with and the doubt of not passing was behind me, but I was proud for doing it, for finally deciding it was time to face the small yet big to me milestone at hand. Though I need much practice driving I can now say I can drive to go get some Dairy Queen when I want some, as long as I don't hit the actual drive through.